Corrupt a wish

[Halichoeres]

Granted, they justify eating dogs based on their delicious flavor.

I wish all meat were lab-grown.

[Stegotyranno420]

granted, but we still hunt for sport.

I wish for world domination

[GojiraGuy1954]

Granted, but it isn't you who dominates the world.

I wish for a grain of sand

[Mellow Stego]

Grant, but it comes in a bucket of dirt.

I wish for a personal submersible so I can travel deep into the oceans.

[GojiraGuy1954]

Grant, but it comes in a bucket of dirt.

I wish for a personal submersible so I can travel deep into the oceans.

Granted, the glass cracks.

I wish for a fistful of dirt from my bucket to appear inside of Mellow's submarine.

[Halichoeres]

Granted, that dirt is actually gold dust and makes Mellow moderately wealthy.

I wish somebody would grade my students' finals for me.

[Stegotyranno420]

granted, but i forge my own exam with a 100% while grading.

I wish I didnt need a degree to get a job i already know how to do

[Mellow Stego]

Granted, that dirt is actually gold dust and makes Mellow moderately wealthy.

I wish somebody would grade my students' finals for me.

Awesome, now I can repair the windows of my submarine!

[Halichoeres]

I wish I didnt need a degree to get a job i already know how to do

Granted, you start the job and realize you vastly underestimated its complexity and overestimated your abilities. You also have only the vaguest idea how it relates to other disciplines, so you do your job as though blind, heedless of the effects of your actions on the broader world.

I wish I could digest lignin.

[GojiraGuy1954]

I wish I didnt need a degree to get a job i already know how to do

Granted, you start the job and realize you vastly underestimated its complexity and overestimated your abilities. You also have only the vaguest idea how it relates to other disciplines, so you do your job as though blind, heedless of the effects of your actions on the broader world.

I wish I could digest lignin.

Granted, but you can only digest Lignin.

I wish that Moose

[Stegotyranno420]

Moose what? Since you have failed to create a intelligible English sentence for your wish, you get a moose thrown at you.


I wish my country's president didn't trip everywhere he went

[Stegotyranno420]

double post

[Halichoeres]

Granted, he trips other people instead.

I wish I could kill kudzu with a touch.

[Bowhead Whale]

Granted. Now you kill anything and anyone with a single touch. Like Midas with his golden touch, you now have the touch of death.

I wish to never have any menstrual pain again, ever.

[Halichoeres]

Granted, all your pain is transferred instead to the nearest puppy.

I wish for a pet elephant that only grows to two feet tall.

[GojiraGuy1954]

Granted, but it's still permenently in Musth.

I wish for an elephant with a double length trunk to appear in Africa

[Gothmog the Baryonyx]

Granted but it cannot breathe properly.

I wish to have a pet Stegouros

[GojiraGuy1954]

Granted but it cannot breathe properly.

I wish to have a pet Stegouros

Granted, but it will hit you in the shins.

I wish Gothmog had no shins for the Stegouros to hit.

[Lynx]

Granted but it cannot breathe properly.

I wish to have a pet Stegouros

Granted, but it will hit you in the shins.

I wish Gothmog had no shins for the Stegouros to hit.

Granted, the Stegouros tears the shins out of Gothmogs legs.

I wish the Stegouros was more gentle.

[Halichoeres]

Granted, its reward for its mildness is extinction. Wait...

I wish I could do a one-handed handstand.