Corrupt a wish

[MLMjp]

Granted

But you loose mobility in your hands so you are not able to communicate with other people by writing or using sing language.

I wish I had a sideshow statue.

[Halichoeres]

I wish I had a sideshow statue.

Granted, but you watch helplessly as a new strain of resin-eating bacteria slowly consumes it.

I wish my country had good high speed trains.

(PS: that Soup-City Raptor alley-oop just made my day.)

[BlueKrono]

I wish I had a sideshow statue.

Granted, but you watch helplessly as a new strain of resin-eating bacteria slowly consumes it.

I wish my country had good high speed trains.

Granted, but it's because your wish made us retroactively lose WWII, and we are now run by two countries with reputations for highly effective transportation. I wish I had a forked tongue.

(PS: that Soup-City Raptor alley-oop just made my day.)

[Silvanusaurus]

Granted, your tongue is forked but it is also 10,000 feet long.

I wish I could talk to trees and plants.

[Soopairik]

Granted, but only in your imagination.

I wish I could sleep 8 hours a day while still being able to do all my work.

[Megalosaurus]

Granted, but all your dreams will be of you being working hard.
I wish I can live my life again but keeping my current knowledge.

[Halichoeres]

I wish I can live my life again but keeping my current knowledge.

Granted, but you find that we live in a deterministic universe and you are powerless to use your newfound knowledge to make any decisions differently. You watch in frustration as you make all the same mistakes of your youth.

I wish the cilantro in my fridge would never wilt before I've used it all.

[Soopairik]

Granted, but your fruits in your fridge will wilt instead.

I wish I could make Mickey Mouse real.

[Halichoeres]

I wish I could make Mickey Mouse real.

Granted, but he likes to bite.

I wish I had access to high quality pdfs of every science paper or edited volume ever written.

[Soopairik]

Granted, but not until you're over 99 years old.

I wish I can buy books for a penny.

[The Atroxious]

Granted, but not until you're over 99 years old.

I wish I can buy books for a penny.

Granted, but the only books you can buy for a penny contain curses that cause you to turn blue, and your hair to fall out.

I wish I had a well trained cape vulture as a pet.

[Megalosaurus]

[...]
I wish I had a well trained cape vulture as a pet.

Granted, but it looses all its featers and its skin gets covered by scales.

I wish to play the new Zelda on Nintendo Switch right now.

[Soopairik]

Granted, but you need to pay for the Switch first.

I wish I could have the Nintendo Switch for free, and it's still functioning.

[PumperKrickel]

deleted

[The Atroxious]

Granted, but you don´t get any games for it.

I wish the colour blue didn´t exist.

Granted, but everything that is blue ceases to exist as well, including oxygen.

I wish I could find the eraser I lost earlier today.

[Halichoeres]

I wish I could find the eraser I lost earlier today.

Granted, but you find it cleaning the litter box after it passes through a cat.

I wish Safari would make an Age of Fishes toob.

[Soopairik]

Granted, but it's not for sale.

I wish I can walk on water.

[Silvanusaurus]

Granted, but you sink and drown in the land.

I wish one of my hands was robotic, and various useful implements and gadgets could extend out of the fingers.

[Halichoeres]

I wish one of my hands was robotic, and various useful implements and gadgets could extend out of the fingers.

Granted, but the metal they're made from is not galvanized, so you must either never wash your hands, or watch your tools rust to powder.

I wish whoever stole my bicycle would return it to me in good repair.

[Soopairik]

Granted, but your bed will get stolen instead and never returned.

I wish I can create clouds.